


Preacher's Prayer

by fireflysglow_archivist



Category: Firefly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-03-21
Updated: 2004-03-21
Packaged: 2019-04-29 07:51:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14468232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireflysglow_archivist/pseuds/fireflysglow_archivist
Summary: Book's past causes trouble for the crew of Serenity





	Preacher's Prayer

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Firefly’s Glow](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Firefly%27s_Glow), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Firefly's Glow collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/fireflysglow/profile).

Preacher's Prayer

## Preacher's Prayer

### by Jebbypal

Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me. Until Joss's movie comes out, I'm just entertaining myself and others. 

Set after Objects In Space, but Inara hasn't left. 

Feedback appreciated. 

Chinese dictionary   
Lese - garbage  
Ee-chi shung-hoo-shi - Let's take a deep breath. chusheng xai-jiao de xiang huo - animal fucking bastard ni me sh b? - Are you okay?  
Chunren - jerk  
qingwa co de limng - frog humping sumbitch diyu - hell  
yuchun- idiot  
hundan - bastard 

* * *

At the bar, Mal smiled to himself. The job was over, they'd been paid and even better, this world was light on Alliance presence; yet, it still boasted enough attractions that all of his crew was happy after several days leave. The black was a good place to be, but now and then it was good to return to civilization and appreciate it. For once, things had gone smooth and all was right in his 'verse. 

Signaling the barkeep for another drink, he turned on his stool to check that the rest of his crew was not getting into too much trouble. Jayne, Book, and the doctor were playing cards with some of the locals. The girls had suckered Wash into accompanying them on their shopping trip around the small settlement. Shaking his head, Mal returned to his drink. Better Wash than him, he thought. Mal could stand all the frippery only so long before he knew he'd do something to get all of Serenity's women mad at him. He'd definitely slipped up somewhere picking his crew - now that all of the women on Serenity got along, well, crew discipline seemed nonexistent until trouble started. Come to think of it, it was all Wash's fault. After Zoe got him to agree to their relationship, everyone seemed to figure that their captain was just plain soft. 

Finishing his drink, he stood and made his way over to the card game. "Time to go folks. Let's go save Wash from breaking his back with packages." 

"In a minute Mal," Jayne growled while glaring at the Captain. With a glance at Jayne, Simon and Book both folded. "Rutting hell, y'all didn't even bet yet," he cursed as the rest of the men at the table followed suit. 

"Collect your money and let's go 'fore you find another way to lose it," Mal ordered as he passed them to go to the door. Upon hearing the click of a gun, he and everyone else in the bar froze in place. 

"Not so fast. The rest of you are welcome to be on your way, but the Preacher here has an appointment to keep that's been a long time waiting," said a woman, whom he assumed was holding the cocked gun. Mal turned around slowly with his both of his hands out away from his sides. He was greeted with the view of an Asian woman pointing a gun at Shepherd Book's head. The Shepherd was still seated at the table while Jayne and Simon were standing. Jayne's eyes darted towards Mal looking for instruction. Mal shook his head slightly; the girl looked jumpy enough to blow a hole in Book if they twitched. 

"Miss, if you need spiritual guidance, I'm sure that we can scare up a few extra Bibles for you. But that man is part of my crew, and he's leaving this rock with me." The woman didn't even glance at Mal as she was too busy keeping a keen eye on Jayne and Book. Although not short, the girl was shorter than any of the three men at the table and she wasn't as stocky as Zoe. If he could distract her a little from the target, there was a chance that Book or Jayne could disarm her without anyone getting hurt. Why didn't it ever go smooth, he thought to himself. 

The woman tipped her hat off of her head so that she had a better view of those she faced. Considering that none of the locals had gone for their weapons or called for the law, Mal assumed that she must be known by the townsfolk. He just wished he knew if they were staying inactive because they liked her or if they knew she was homicidal. 

"The only thing I'll need a Bible for is the funeral, assuming I decide to give this lese one. Now, you three can walk out of here anytime, but I do have some fellas coming to join me as are interested in seeing as I get to talk with the preacher. So go on while the getting's good," the girl said while carefully eyeing both Jayne and Mal. 

"Ee-chi shung-hoo-shi," Book said calmy. 

"Take as many as you like chusheng xai-jiao de xiang huo," the woman reply coldly. 

"Woah, now, I think this is getting a little personal. I'm quite certain that the Shepherd told us that was against his vows, isn't that so boys?" Mal asked. 

"Yes, sir. Said fucking of any sort was not allowed, poor sod," Jayne replied quickly. A second later, the woman was distracted when Zoe and the rest of the crew arrived through the door. Jayne reacted immediately by tackling her as Book grabbed the dropped gun. The merc continued to wrestle with the woman until once again all movement in the saloon ceased at the sound of guns being readied. Mal cursed silently at the fact that the guns were once again behind him. Looked like everyone's reinforcements had arrived, he thought. 

"Mayli, ni me sh b?" a man called out from behind the crew of Serenity. 

"What do you think chunren?" the girl shouted back. "Get off me you qingwa co de limng!" 

"Hey Mal, this one seems to have a fixation with . . . owww!" Mayli interrupted Jayne's statement with a knee to the groin and then managed to push the large merc off of her. 

"Captain, what's going on?" Zoe inquired as she and the rest of the crew stood with their hands raised. 

"I'll let you know as soon as I figure it out, I promise," Mal replied sharply. 

Mayli stood gingerly and leaned heavily on the table. After relieving Book of her gun, she looked behind Mal. "The offer still stands, Captain, take you and yours and go." 

Mal shook his head. "Maybe I didn't make myself clear, but he's one of mine." 

Mal felt a rifle barrel touch the back of his head. "No, it's you who isn't clear," a man's voice said slowly, as if to a child. "There's ten of us with guns trained on you, we're taking your preacher and there's nothing you can do but accept it easy or hard. We dislike digging graves, so we'd prefer you to take the easy way." 

"Nahh, let's make 'em dig their own graves," another voice added. 

"Captain, it's okay," Book offered. 

"We ain't leaving no one behind today Shepherd," Mal informed him. 

"Mayli?" asked the man holding the gun to Mal's head. 

"I done the hard part, just taking a rest," the woman said as she lost her grip on the table and started to fall towards the floor. 

"If any of 'em move, shoot," the man in charge ordered as he shouldered past Mal. "Diyu, Mayli. Why do you always wait till the gorram doctor's leave a place to get hurt?" 

"Only way to see that funny look on your faces, of course," Mayli muttered. 

"The way I see it, we might be able to work us a compromise here fellas," Mal offered. "Those guns get lowered and we all walk out of here in exchange for help for your friend." 

"Or your doc helps anyway and we still get what we want," the man beside Mayli returned. 

"Sure, if you're smart enough to be able to tell which one's the doctor, it could go that way," Mal taunted. 

"Horace, take the preacher, the short one, and two of the women back to camp," the man ordered as he placed his jacket under Mayli's head. 

"Yes, boss. Kill 'em or just tie 'em up." 

"Just keep 'em quiet till Mayli and I join you yuchun!" The man in charge stood and rested his rifle on his shoulder as his orders were carried out. After Book, Wash, Zoe, and Inara had been led from the saloon, he walked up to Mal. "Now here's how this is going to work hundan, you are going to get your doctor to help her. In return, you get everyone back except your preacher. Dong ma?" The leader of the group punctuated his point by poking Mal in the chest with his gun as he spoke the last two words. 

"I'll repeat myself," Mal said quietly. "I ain't leaving no one behind." 

"Nate," Mayli called. 

"I'm negotiating honey," he replied, never taking his eyes off of Mal. 

"How 'bout what you said and then we have a trial. The crew can even be jury," Mayli suggested from her position on the floor. 

Nate smiled at Mal. "My girl gets the most interesting ideas into her head and this one might actually be fun. What do you say?" 

* * *

Preacher's Prayer Ch. 2  
Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me. Until Joss's movie comes out, I'm just entertaining myself and others. 

Thanks for the feedback everyone. 

Summary of ch. 1: Book, Wash, Inara, and Zoe have been taken by people after Book. 

Mal crouched next to Simon. "Well, Doc?" Simon glanced at him, then at the man hovering a few yards a way with the large gun on his shoulder. 

"There are no obvious injuries, Captain. I need to take her to the infirmary." 

"If there's no injuries maybe she doesn't need to go?" Mal suggested with a hard look. He was desperately trying to let the boy know letting these psychotics on his ship was the absolute last thing he wanted to happen. 

Simon shook his head. "No, there is something wrong, but it appears to be an aggravation of an older injury," he explained. "She is experiencing loss of sensation in one of her legs, but her pulse is fine. Also, she is experiencing some shock." 

"Captain-dummy talk please?" Mal asked with a blank expression. 

"Something is pressing on a nerve somewhere," Simon restated with a sigh. 

Mal looked over at Nate, the apparent head of this group of kidnappers, vigilantes and psychos. The larger man was getting very restless and it was obvious from his demeanor that the outcome of Mayli's situation would have definite consequences for those he'd taken as hostages. Mal was not eager to have the man on his ship with a large number of armed men with him. "Fine, get Jayne to help you transport her." 

"Well?" Nate asked as Mal approached him. 

"The doctor thinks he can help her, but he needs to be back on the ship to do it." 

"Let's go then." Mal put his hand on the other man's shoulder to stop him. 

"Only you and one other can go to the ship with us. I'm not going to have you deciding that Justice needs my ship too." The taller man glared at Mal. His face gave Mal the impression that he was imagining several ways to kill him, but suddenly he gave a quirky smile that didn't reach his black eyes. 

"Don't worry Captain, your ship is safe. Now let's get Mayli and the doctor where they need to be." Turning from the other man, Nate addressed the rest of his group. "Weera, you're with me. The rest of you head back to camp." 

The walk to the ship was short, but Mal managed to drop in beside Kaylee and River. "Cap'n, what is it they think the Shepherd did?" Kaylee asked worriedly. 

Mal gave her a one armed hug to reassure her. "I'm sure it's just a case of mistaken identity Lil' Kaylee." 

"No mistake. Same person, different life. But life exists so it must be ended," River intoned as they walked. Mal glanced at the teen worriedly. The last thing they needed today was for the girl to have a fit around a bunch of twitchy, violent and armed men. 

"Kaylee, you need to look after River. I'm going to try to make sure y'all get to stay on Serenity. Keep her calm and make sure the ship's ready to run, dong ma?" 

"Yes Cap'n," Kaylee chirped certain that her captain could pull off another miracle even though they were badly outnumbered. Nate joined their little group and pushed Mal away from the girls. 

"You stay with me. No need to have any conspiring going on," he ordered. 

Mal rolled his eyes as they arrived at the ship. "I think you've got enough conspiracy to go around." 

"Sure hope the good doctor gets that crazy woman in tip top health," Wash muttered as he and the other hostages wearily stumbled into the vigilantes' camp. 

"The doctor's good at his job. I'm sure we have nothing to worry about," Inara soothed. Zoe just gave Inara a look. 

"You mean nothing to worry about except the part where Book's mysterious past has us being held hostage and a trial on the morrow?" Wash snarked. 

Inara maintained her composure in the face of Wash's sarcasm. "Book is always good at getting people to see reason, even Mal." 

Zoe sat down beside a campfire as their "guide" indicated. "It's easy to get people who don't have a grudge to see reason. Seems to me that this woman at least is nursing a grudge and looking to see the preacher in a world of hurt," Zoe interjected. 

Inara and Wash made themselves comfortable at the fire while Zoe took in the surrounding camp. It appeared to be well organized and the men were disciplined. Although they pushed and cursed, no hands had abused the preacher on the trip and as soon as they entered the campground, he had been marched off to a small tent that was closely guarded. She couldn't see any children, which argued against this location being a separate settlement. The number of arms readily available made her wonder why the neighboring town allowed a seemingly raider-like group to exist so close to it. 

"Here's some chow. Help yourselves. Going to be a clear night, so you'll sleep by the fire," one of their escorts said. The man placed a pot of food on the fire in front of them and handed several cups to Zoe. "Oh, and before you start thinking of making a run for it, you should know that this place has some indigenous carnivore creatures that roam these woods. Settlement pays us to patrol and make sure none get overly bold, but I wouldn't go running about these parts unarmed." 

"Would you tell us why you want the Shepherd to stand trial?" Inara inquired quickly before the man left. He just laughed. 

"No sense in spoiling the surprise. Gonna be fun to see the looks on your all's faces," he replied with a head shake. 

"Well, hopefully dinner is something other than protein cubes," Wash said hopefully. Zoe just handed him a cup and worried about what the morning would bring. 

* * *

The man who had accompanied the group to the ship stayed in the cargo bay while Nate accompanied Mal and Simon to the infirmary. "I'll need to sedate her for the scan so she doesn't move. I'll let you know the results when I'm done," Simon stated, his intention to get the two men to leave the cramped confines of the sickbay so he could work. 

"In a minute, Doc. You two mind waiting outside for a few minutes?" Nate said with the tone of an order rather than a suggestion. Mal nodded as he and Simon left the room. 

In the corridor, Mal observed the two who had caused his crew so much grief on this day. By appearance alone they were a mismatched pair, what with the man's excessive height and muscular build - he towered over even Jayne. Next to him, Mayli seemed like an enlarged porcelain doll. But there was a hardness about both of them that indicated their lives had been full of trials. Mal had seen nothing to indicate that the smaller woman had any softness about her, but it was obvious that she was very important to her comrade. In a way, it reminded him of the side of Zoe that had been exposed by her relationship with Wash. Nate's rugged face lit up whenever he was talking to the younger woman. It was odd to see a man so obviously made for violence and war to be so caring and tender, but then it wasn't often that Mal saw his adversaries around their loved ones. Seeing that the dark-haired man could show kindness gave him hope that maybe they'd be able to reason their way out of this without too much bloodshed. Of course, that assumed that the woman, Mayli, listened to Nate's counsel. 

"Simon, I'm sure I don't have to tell you how important it is that this goes smooth?" The doctor shook his head and started to talk. "Quiet now, just listen. While I'm not telling you to hurt her, it might make things a bit easier if she sleeps a good long while, dong ma?" The younger man just nodded as Nate exited the infirmary. 

Nate scowled at the two men. "Whatever you two are thinking, scratch it. I want you to know Doctor, that whatever the result of your work is, I'll see to it that your captain is dealt the same hand. Now, Cap, how 'bouts you show me where we can get some coffee on this boat while we wait." Mal glanced at the doctor and gave him a nod before turning to lead the other to the galley. 

Nate sat down at the table as he waited for Mal to prepare the drinks. Relaxing marginally, he ran his hands through his close-cut black hair as he made conversation. "You've got a fine ship here Captain. Can't say that I understand why you'd risk it for a non-essential crew member." Mal handed the other man his coffee and sat across from him. 

"Were you in the war Nate?" Nate's square face closed down completely at the question. Mal finally spotted the cold hardness in his black eyes that matched the woman's. Maybe the pair was made for each other after all. 

"That's neither here nor there Reynolds. War's over." 

Mal nodded. "For some that's true enough. However, I had to leave far too many men on the battlefield to justify leaving anyone under my command behind ever again. An honorable man like yourself shouldn't have to have that 'splained to him, I'd think." Nate tightened his hands around his metal cup until the knuckles were white, ignoring the heat of the liquid inside. Guess honor is touchy subject among kidnappers and vigilantes, Mal thought to himself as he inwardly winced in sympathy for the other's fingers.. When Nate left the room without an answer, Mal went to look for Jayne. They needed to formulate some type of a plan that didn't include the mercenary going off half-cocked. 

* * *

Nate stepped into the infirmary just as Simon had finished the necessary scans. "Well, Doc?" Simon jumped upon hearing the gunman's voice behind him. Gathering his professional demeanor, he turned to face his questioner. 

"She has shrapnel in her back that appears to have been jarred free of the surrounding scar tissue. I'm going to need to operate to remove it," he informed the man. Nate didn't react in any way to the news. "May I ask why the shrapnel was never removed before now?" Simon asked with concern. There could be something about the case that he wasn't able to detect with Serenity's less than-stellar medical equipment 

Nate moved to Mayli's side and took her limp hand. "Her homeworld was attacked by the Alliance for providing the Independents with supplies. The Independents eventually came and provided some help while getting new enlistments, but they didn't have enough med supplies to go around to those who weren't going to fight." Simon remained quiet as he watched the man stroke Mayli's hair. "She always said it tweren't nothing. Once it healed it didn't stop her from keeping up or doing her share, but from time to time, well let's just say her less than sunny disposition would get much worse." 

Nate tenderly placed the woman's hand back on the gurney and gave Simon a measured look. "You fix this doc, you'll have my gratitude. I can't pay you and I can't do what I know you'll try to ask for, but once this ship leaves this rock, you ever need anything I'll do what I can." Before Simon could answer, he found himself just nodding to the man's back as he walked swiftly out of the infirmary. 

\-- 

Mal found Jayne in his bunk. Nate's man wasn't showing too much brilliance to just let the merc go off on his own. Mal was pleased to see that Jayne had used the time to collect every small, concealable weapon available in his arsenal. "You're not going to war without me are you?" 

"Figured we could take 'em quick while there's only two of them as can fight." 

Mal shook his head. "We'll take those weapons, but if we do anything against those three, we'll be killing the rest." Mal leaned against the ladder. "Besides, if we play along with this trial, we might finally get to know all the preacher's secrets." 

Jayne started to smile at the thought, but it quickly turned into the usual puzzled expression that indicated the man was thinking something through for once. "But what if he turns out to be someone important and these loon-jobs say we were the ones that killed him?" 

"That's a thought. Mayli and Nate don't strike me as the types to give others credit for their kills though." 

"Walking into their camp full of armed men don't strike me as smart neither." 

Mal sighed. "We'll play it by ear. I intend to get River and Kaylee left. Bring as many weapons as you can without drawing attention and try to find a time that you can arm Wash and Zoe." 

Mal was climbing back up the ladder when Jayne spoke again. "Never figured I'd be this uneasy on the other side of a trial before." Mal shook his head and grinned. Honestly, he never thought he'd see Jayne on this side of a trial at all, he thought with a chuckle. 

* * *

Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me. Until Joss's movie comes out, I'm just entertaining myself and others. 

Not beta-ed, so if there are too many glaring typos let me know. All the shiny feedback jumpstarted the dialogue again, so I figured I should stop dangling the plot quite so much. :) 

Summary: Inara, Book, Wash, and Zoe have been taken captive by people upset with Book. Mal is being forced to allow Simon to treat one of the captors. 

Chinese  
Fei hua - crap talk ai ren - sweetheart nien ching duh - little girl  
Ma shong - fast, on the double 

* * *

Preacher's Prayer - Chapter 3  
By Jebbypal

"I told you I can walk!" 

"Mayli, please, the doc just fixed you. We'll take their mule." 

"Fei hua, I'm fine." 

Simon rolled his eyes from where he stood behind the infirmary table. "If you can walk to the ramp, then fine, I'll be more than happy to let you walk to wherever you're going," he finally interceded in the endless argument. 

"We're waiting, nien ching duh," Nate said as walked to the infirmary's door. Leaning against it, he shook his head at her stubbornness as Mayli grimaced when she got off the table and stood for several seconds to recover. "Ma shong! At this rate the hundan will die before we hang him!" Nate nearly yelled in exasperation. Mayli just glared at the taller man before beginning to slowly limp towards the door. Nate remained in the doorway forcing her to shift her weight in order to get by. She yelped as she placed her balance on her injured leg and Nate grabbed her quickly before she could fall. Swinging the woman over his shoulder in one move, he proceeded to the cargo bay. "Right-o, girlie. The mule it is." 

Simon almost chuckled at the sight until he remembered where they were taking the mule. Grabbing a prepared medkit, he quickly followed. Jayne and Mal were waiting in the cargo bay with the other member of their adversaries' group. 

"I figure the three girls can all take the mule, and we'll follow." 

"You figure wrong," Mal replied shaking his head. He continued quickly before the other man could reply. "The girls will stay here. The youngest one got dropped on her head a lot as a child and just isn't right," Mal offered as explanation. 

Nate considered this as he set Mayli down by the mule. "Fine, Reynolds you'll ride the mule with her as well as the doctor." 

"How come I gotta walk?" Jayne complained. 

"You got a problem with it and Weera can put a bullet in your leg," Nate replied as Weera grinned at him. 

"Are we going or are we torturing Jayne?" Mal asked. "Just so's I'm clear." 

Mayli laughed. "Get on the gorram mule Reynolds." Kaylee and River watched their preparations from the catwalk and gave hopeful waves as the group departed the ship. 

* * *

The group arrived at the camp just shortly after dawn. Jayne and Mal were shown to where the others were sleeping while Simon went with Nate so he could check on Mayli. 

"I'll be back soon ai ren, get some rest when the doc's done," Nate said as he sat her on the bed gently. 

"I just want to check the bandages and sensation," Simon explained. "Is there much pain?" 

Mayli laid facedown on the cot after she removed her pants. "Not bad now that I'm not on top of lousy suspension going over the bumpiest ground your gorram captain can find." 

"I don't think he was trying to make the ride rough on purpose." 

"I pointed out three of those rutting holes and more than mentioned the mini-boulder!" 

"He went in the direction you instructed." 

"Vaguely in the direction, there's a difference. Are you done yet?" 

"Almost." Simon worked for a minute before speaking again. "May I ask you a question?" Mayli didn't answer one way or another, so he figured he might as well. "What do you think Shepherd Book did that you are taking so personally?" 

Mayli remained quiet for so long that he thought she had fallen asleep. Finally, her voice quietly came to him. "Where were you during the war?" 

"I was attending the medical academy on Os. . . on a planet in the core." 

"So you never saw the fighting, never knew anyone affected by it?" 

"Not at the time. But both the captain and Zoe. . ." 

"I didn't ask if you knew any soldiers, Doctor!" she replied. 

"No, at the time I didn't know anyone. So you fought in the war with the Independents?" 

"For a doc, you're pretty dumb. Not everyone affected by the war was a soldier," Mayli explained snidely. 

When she remained silent for a few minutes, he assumed she had said everything she was willing too. Simon pulled her shirt down over the bandage on her lower back and leg. He stopped putting his medkit away when he heard her sob quietly. "Do you need something for the pain?" 

Mayli emitted a strangled laugh. "Nothing you have can touch this, doctor. I lay for two days in the wreckage the Alliance's bombing caused just because we'd sold food to the browncoats. When I wasn't praying for rain to ease the thirst, I was begging my family to hang on. Telling my husband that help would arrive soon and they'd be able to sew his legs back on as pretty as . . . Begging my son to keep crying so I'd know he was awake, know he was still alive. When Nate pulled me out, the sun was rising on the third day. I begged him to not go for the medics. I pleaded with him to get a body bag for me instead." 

Simon was stunned. The image of what she must have endured was staggering. To have come through that and managed to retain even a semblance of sanity; he began to doubt that Mal or anyone would be able to talk her out of killing Book. "That, umm, sounds horrible. Still, Shepherd Book couldn't be personally responsible for what happened." 

Mayli never turned her head away from the wall as she replied. "Convince me of that Doctor, and I'll even apologize when I let y'all go." 

\-- 

Nate was waiting for him when Simon finally exited the tent. "What's your prognosis doc?" 

"She's recovering well. Given rest and no complications, she should have more mobility and less pain than she has had in the past." 

"But not as good as new?" 

Simon shook his head. "I'm sorry, but after this much time the amount of scar tissue is too great. I removed as much as possible, but with the equipment I have, I was forced to be conservative to ensure no nerve damage." 

Nate nodded. "Fine, we got no problem then. You saw where I parked the rest, go join 'em." 

"Wait, if possible, could I, umm, check on the shepherd?" At Nate's accusing glare, he continued quickly, "The strains of the past few days at his age, I'm only concerned about his health." 

"Fine, come on then." Nate stopped at the front of Book's tent and turned to Simon. Grabbing the younger man roughly by the shoulder, he gave him a shake as he warned, "You do anything, and I mean anything, that even smells or looks like an escape or an attempt to help this man avoid justice, and I will personally hold your eyes open when we kill those two girls still on the ship. Dong ma?" Simon just nodded with wide eyes as he stared at the taller man. When he was finally released and Nate walked away from the tent, he let out his breath as he struggled to stay upright on his shaky knees. Silently, he prayed that Mal could come up with a different plan, because there was no way he would put his sister or Kaylee at risk. 

After recovering somewhat, Simon entered the small tent. "Book? Are you in here?" The interior was pitch black, apparently their captors had not seen fit to leave a light source for the accused. Simon fumbled for a light from his medkit before advancing from the entrance flap. 

"Simon?" a groggy voice replied after a few minutes. 

"Yes, it's me. Hold on a second." Simon flicked on the pen light before turning towards the voice. He found Book sitting up on a small pallet of blankets on the ground. "Are you okay? Do you need anything?" he asked as he knelt down beside the man. 

Book shook his head. "I'm fine Doctor. Just trying to appreciate the sounds of nature before we all return to the ship." Simon chewed on his lip at the preacher's statement. Mayli's conviction and torment had caused him to wonder if Book's prediction would occur. If she possessed any proof that Book's relationship with the Alliance connected him with planetary raids on civilians, he wasn't certain that Mal and Zoe wouldn't assist in the hanging. 

"Have they told you, or do you know what it is they think you did?" 

"Every man performs acts that he later wishes he could rescind Simon. There are many things, many facts that I would willingly give my life to change if I could. Unfortunately, the past is the past, but I believe only God is fit to judge my actions." 

"I've talked to some people who feel very differently about that." 

"Well, I hope that you will pray with me that these people do not commit any acts that would cause God to judge them harshly." 

"Book, I need to know, were you ever involved in any attacks on civilian planetary targets? Like planets known to give the Independents supplies?" 

Book looked sadly at Simon. "The past is the past Simon. I'm not that person." The doctor sighed and left the older man to his meditations. 

\-- 

Mal was relieved to be reunited with his crew. Although their situation was precarious still, he preferred to enjoy the illusion that he could affect the outcome if events ended in trouble. Mal nodded to Jayne when the merc roughly insinuated himself between Zoe and Wash. Zoe's abuse for his roughness was aborted when she felt the small caliber pistol pressed into her thigh. 

"So, is the chow good?" Mal asked conversationally. 

* * *

Ch 4  
Chinese  
Shide - yes  
Zhuzui - quiet, shut up.  
ta-ma-de hwu dan - mother humping son of a bitch

* * *

Nate rubbed his face tiredly and decided it was probably time to wake Mayli. The men were getting restless about the possibility that the settlement might call the feds in and were eager to be rid of the preacher and the rest of Serenity's crew. He'd watched their interactions carefully when he could and he was beginning to think that it would be difficult for Mayli to get all of these people to agree to condemn their friend. The short man didn't appear to hold grudges while the Companion was impossible to fully predict. Neither of them appeared to have ever experienced anything that would cause them to fully sympathize with Mayli's anger. 

Of course, if you only glanced at Mayli in passing, you'd never imagine what she was capable either. When he'd found her in the wreckage of her home nine years ago, Mayli had just turned twenty and looked all of fourteen. At least until you looked at her eyes, he thought. That haunted look had been the reason he'd requested permission to stay on Temburong when the unit his med team was attached to received orders to leave. Since there had been so many injured and very few doctors or healers had survived, his commander had agreed grudgingly that their unit could spare a lowly medic. Mayli had been confused when he told her he'd left the Independents. All of the enlisted people she had seen had either been idealistic or angry. She decided in turns that he was either a coward or had joined to escape something and had watched him carefully when she informed him of her judgments. Secretly, Nate had fibbed here and there enough to keep her interested, anything to give her the strength to want to make it through the night to question him again. Slowly she had healed, but with every day that passed he grew more attached to her, more determined to help her move past the grief. 

In their tent, he found Mayli awake. 

"Wondered when you were going to make an appearance." 

Nate nodded and sat on the cot beside her. "Figured you could use the rest," he replied as he studied her. 

"I've come to find that sleep is highly overrated," Mayli replied crankily. 

"Mayli, are you sure you want to go through with this?" Nate mentally kicked himself for the question when he saw the woman's face light up with anger. 

"How can you even ask!" 

He sighed. In for a penny, might as well have the argument. Maybe this would be the time she'd listen. "Gorram it, calm down and think this through logically for once. You saw this man's face on a cortex screen in the media and you're convinced that he deserves this? You don't even have any real evidence he was with the ships that bombed. . ." 

His face stung when she slapped him. "You said you would do this with me," she said quietly. 

"And when have I not done everything to help you. We spent two years in the core trying to find him. When we came here, I thought you had finally given this up. We were happy until you spotted this chunren in that bar!" 

"No!" Mayli shouted as she stood and walked as far away from him as she could in the tent. Catching herself, she continued more quietly, "You were happy, I was just here. Did you search his room like I told you to?" 

"Shide." He leaned forward offering her a small object. "It took longer than I'd have liked, but I found his Ident card. Don't know how you think this helps though - we don't have any means to scan it." 

She almost smiled when she took the card from him. "They don't know that though, do they?" 

"You're crazy if you think that Captain is going to let you kill that man with a bluff." 

"We'll see, won't we?" 

* * *

The monotony of their relative captivity was finally ended when Weera, one of Nate's men, dragged the preacher from his tent. Book's hands had been tied in front of him and Weera used the bindings to pull the other man after him. Finally, Book was roughly pushed down in front of a tree and Weera backed off a few yards. 

"Finally!" Jayne said quietly. "Sitting around on a planet ain't any fun if there's no booze or women around." 

"Glad to know your priorities Jayne," remarked Zoe. 

Jayne looked at her confused. "Just got better ways to spend my time is all." 

"Zhuzui!" Mal whispered. 

The rest of the camp began to gather in a rough circle around Serenity's crew when Nate and Mayli exited their tent and took a position between Book and the others. Nate glanced at them before he started speaking. "Well Preacher, you've had a night to think things over. Want to save us all some time and get anything off your chest?" 

Book smiled up at the other man. "Nothing that I can think of that would interest you I'm afraid." 

Nate shook his head. This man seemed too peaceful. In the face of threats he was showing no guilt or even worry. Nate sighed and glanced at Mayli. He'd agreed to follow her plan, but he wasn't sure that she'd get the results she hoped for. "Well, I have an idea, how 'bout you tell us what your name was before you took your vows then." 

"That's in the past. I don't see how it has any bearing on today," Book answered, his serene smile still locked in place. 

When Mayli put a hand on Nate's shoulder, he stepped back and joined the men behind them. With an aggressive smile, she approached the shepherd slowly as she spoke. "Shepherd, I'm sure those vows say some pretty specific things about falsehoods and the like." After he nodded, she continued. "So you won't deny that the name Harold Malm was given to you by your parents?" Mayli's smile only grew larger when she heard Serenity's captain and first officer begin to curse loudly. 

When she turned to face them, both were on their feet. "Hang the ta-ma-de hwu dan now. Enough of our time's been wasted as it is," Mal shouted. Simon and Inara just looked at each other in confusion. 

"Mal, no. This is supposed to be a trial, not a vigilante's lynching," Inara protested. 

"If she'd said that name a day ago, we wouldn't even be here," Zoe told her. 

"But we are and the rest of us don't understand," the Companion argued. 

Wash put his hand in the air as he spoke. "I'd like to know why we're hanging our FRIEND too. Just to help me sleep at night you know." 

Mal turned his glare at Book. "Go ahead preacher. Tell 'em what you did before you found your god." 

"Everyone has acts that they would like to take back, Captain. I've changed who I am to try to atone for mine." 

"How's that working out for you so far? Have you been forgiven for any of the planets you destroyed yet? Do you have to do extra penance for the women and children?" Mal questioned. 

Inara stood up and confronted Mal and Zoe. "So he fought in the war - horrible things happen in wars Mal. Does that negate all the good he's ever done? He saved your life for God's sake." 

"He's the best cook on the ship too," Jayne offered. 

Inara turned pleadingly to the rest of the people in the camp. "You said this was to be a trial! What do you think the Alliance is going to do when they hear you lynched an officer for his name?" 

"She's right you know," Nate told Mayli. 

"Fine, we can hear all about the man's good works and new leaf tomorrow. And I think Malcolm Reynolds is just the person to tell us all about it," Mayli said as she turned her back on the now divided crew. 

__

Chapter 5 

After dinner, Mal was forced to join the preacher in his tent. "So is it Harry or General?" he asked scornfully. 

"Captain," Book greeted tiredly. "Guess I should be thankful that they didn't think to appoint Jayne my advocate." 

"Could be that would have been a better choice the way I see it." 

"If that's your opinion, then I guess I might as well get a good night's sleep." 

Mal walked over and stood over the preacher. Pulling the pistol concealed in his waistband, he slowly spoke his threat. "That's my opinion preacher. But before you do any type of sleeping, I think you should convince me why you should ever wake up again." 

Book looked past the barrel of the pistol and into Mal's eyes. He had hoped to be able to explain things to the younger man in his own time, in a way that didn't include the hatred he now saw in Mal's eyes. Why God had seen fit to allow this turn of events before he had managed to bring the Captain back to his faith, he didn't understand. But perhaps if he could get through to Mal now, then maybe they had a chance to get through to Mayli and Nate. 

"It was war, Captain." 

"Funny, ya see, I musta missed the section of boot camp on the slaughter of non-combatants. Why don't you 'splain it better than that?" 

"You already know most of it, I reckon. My unit was in charge of putting down revolts at first . . ." 

"Meaning Shadow and all those other worlds where infantry landed, occupied, and imprisoned the families of Independents?" 

"Yes. It was distasteful, but necessary. Those worlds were still under Alliance protection and the majority of their populations wanted things to stay that way. I was following my orders," Book explained with conviction. 

"Temburong and the other planets where the settlements and cities were bombed to the ground? That was orders too? Funny, but I don't recall them being on your all's sides of the lines," Mal accused. 

"Then think for a minute like a leader rather than a sergeant! Those worlds were providing the Independents with everything. If they had been allowed to continued, the war probably would have continued for another three years at least! And no, the outcome wouldn't have been any different, we still had more men and more ships. Their settlements were near the farmlands, their factories in their cities, and the supply depots well hidden. We had no choice but to accept bystander casualties." 

Mal trembled with anger as he held Book's gaze. "Shepherd, you sure as hell have an odd way of arguing for your life." 

"Captain, Mal, I believed in what I fought for just as much as you did. Yes, as time went on, I began to question some of the methods, but I believed the Unification was necessary and good. By the time I stopped to question the means, I convinced myself it wouldn't have mattered - someone else would have eagerly stepped up to give the orders as I was hauled off for treason. I saw it happen to others. However, I regret it and will answer for it. But not this way," he demanded. 

Mal answered with cold fury, "And why the hell not? Seems as good a way as any." 

"Are you not even going to ask then?" Book questioned. 

"Ask what?" Mal questioned. "Don't figure there's a lot of asking to be done," he answered as he cocked his gun. 

"Think it through. Why do you, Zoe and those other two even know my name?" 

"Fine, then. Why?" Mal asked shrugging his shoulders slightly. 

"I didn't even realize at the time son, but as I was following my orders, I was being portrayed as a hero of the Alliance. Why, I'm sure if you ask Simon to think past his studies, he probably even recalls the war vids of it. Of course, I looked a bit different; hair was regulation and all then. When the war was over, I was congratulated by complete strangers for what I had done. For killing their counterparts who couldn't fight back. I couldn't take it anymore. The guilt began to eat at me, it all seemed empty." Book stared off into space remembering those few weeks he'd spent at home. His wife hadn't understood. To her, he'd done his duty and there was no shame to be had in it. She was angry that he'd felt guilt where she thought he should feel pride. Their marriage was just one more casualty of all the obeyed orders, all the deaths. "So I left it all, went to the only place where I was condemned for all that I had done, condemned but forgiven." 

"So you found God and bygones are bygones now? That's supposed to make it all alright," Mal stated, his face showing his distaste. 

"Hell, no Mal. It doesn't make it right!" Book shouted back, jumping to his feet. "And the years I spent there didn't make the guilt go away either. But in the end you can't judge me, not unless you want all the families of all the boys and girls you've killed to come seeking justice too. Like I said it was war." 

Mal lowered his gun finally and backed up a few steps. "So that's what you want me to tell that girl out there, who I'll remind you didn't fight in our war?" he asked accusingly. 

Book sighed. "Not particularly, no. But do you understand? Only God can judge us for what we did during that war, we didn't break any laws of men. And I can't make up for what I've taken away from her, from you or anyone else. Instead, I'm trying to live better, always be a help. Letting her kill me won't take away her pain, her anger. It will only leave her hollow Mal. What do you think will happen to her then?" 

Mal considered it. He remembered the anger and hate he felt when he'd heard about his Ma's death on Shadow and about the hands that'd been sent to camps while their lands were taken away. It had kept him going that last year of the war, kept him fighting and gave him energy to give to the men he lead. But in Serenity Valley, he'd found the hollowness too. 

Looking into Book's eyes now, he saw that the other man had felt the same hollowness at one time. The only thing that had kept Mal from bowing to the hollowness and finding an end was Zoe. And then later, the freedom he felt when flying his own ship in the black, that had been the first time he'd felt any emotion since the Valley other than emptiness. It had been a long time coming, but it had been worth it. The hollowness was still there, still hung over his shoulder like ghost haunting him, waiting to possess him the moment he lost anything dear. 

If all Mayli was living for was vengeance against Book, she wouldn't be long for this 'verse afterward. And if not, well, maybe Book's God would judge him after he died a natural death. 'Course, Simon might actually kiss Kaylee too, but stranger things had happened. Mal holstered his gun and turned to go. 

"Well Captain?" 

"She said we were the jury. We'll see what the other's think." Besides, he thought to himself as he left the tent, it wouldn't do Book any harm whatsoever to stew over it. 

* * *

Chapter 6  
Chinese glossary  
Xin gan - darling  
Gunkai - fuck off  
goushi buru - lowest of the low 

* * *

"Sir?" Zoe questioned as Mal rejoined his crew at their camping spot. He had to admit, that was one piece of good luck that had come their way during this ordeal. The nights they'd had to spend in this camp had been rain-free and not too cold. He finally met Zoe's gaze when she repeated her question.

"What?" he replied tiredly. Despite having done nothing all day but sit and listen, he was completely drained from all the revelations about Book's past. 

Zoe scowled at his false obliviousness. "You were in there a long time. Anything important I should know?" 

Mal looked around the fire. He must have lost track of time. Everyone else around the fire was asleep. He really wished that Zoe was too. He didn't feel like replaying his conversation with the preacher right now. "If you are wondering if we're trying the wrong man, we're not. Don't know that Inara isn't right though." 

Zoe looked at Mal stunned. Before she could say anything, he held up his hand to stop her. "Look, I'm not saying I'm fine with what the man did. But he's right, it was war. Even if he'd refused, like as not all those worlds would still have been attacked." Mal lay down on his bed roll. "I'm sure we'll get into this tomorrow again. Try and get some sleep." With that, he rolled over and left Zoe with her questions. 

\-- 

The trial recommenced bright and early the next morning. A little too bright and early for both Mal and Zoe who had both spent the night wrestling with their memories. Mal's mind was blank as he stood between Book and Mayli. This woman was a mystery to him, he hadn't even talked more than three sentences with her. How was he supposed to know what to say to keep the Shepherd alive? Nate was a strange one too, but Mal thought he had the man figured out. From what he'd seen, Nate wasn't too eager to kill, but well, one could never really know. 

The shorter Asian woman stood looking at him, eager to hear if he'd even attempt a defense. Mayli had a hard time even keeping the smile off of her face. Yesterday had turned out even better than expected, who'd of guessed that the Browncoat's own world had been attacked by the hundan. "We gonna stand here all day Reynolds, or are we gonna finish this thing?" 

Mal looked over at his crew and received a nod from Zoe. She'd been quiet at breakfast as he'd outlined his plan, but she hadn't dissented. She didn't agree either, but he knew he could always count on her to stand with him when they were humped. They'd deal with Book in their own time, but now they were united. 

"We already voted. It was war, Mayli, that man didn't hurt anyone out of malice. Malm, Book, whoever, he goes free with us," Mal told her calmly. The people in the camp watching the proceedings muttered quietly. Mal spied Nate push his way forward till he was behind Mayli while out of the corner of his eye he saw Zoe and Jayne prepare for trouble. 

"Well, guess I know now why the Independents lost the war," Mayli replied with scorn. "You all just don't have the balls to follow through on what's gotta be done," she continued as she raised the shotgun she carried. 

Jayne, Zoe and Wash all reacted by pulling their weapons as well. Mal kept his hands in the open as he made sure he stayed between Mayli and the restrained Book. "You might want to consider that you only have one shot there girl, is he really worth you're life?" Mal questioned calmly. 

Nate moved closer to Mayli. "He's right xin gan. We told them they'd decide - it's over." 

"Gunkai Nate. It'll be over when he's dead," Mayli replied coldly. 

Mal looked around. The people in the camp hadn't pulled in any weapons yet, so if they took out Mayli and he managed to not get shot, they might actually be able to get out of this. Or they might just be humped. "I'll repeat myself girl, you've only got one shot and I'm not letting you kill anyone," Mal warned her. 

Mayli's face took on a speculative look. "Well, actually, that might not be a problem. Guess I've been too focused all this time - the Independents share the blame just as much Malm does. You goushi buru soldiers took our supplies and our men, but couldn't be bothered to defend us. One shot will be all I need; it's just up to you which one gets it." 

A pistol cocked behind Mayli. "Please, Mayli, don't do this," Nate asked desperately. Mayli didn't even acknowledge him as she pulled the trigger. Two pistols sounded first and knocked her aim just to the left of Mal's head. Mayli fell, blood blossoming on her chest and torso. Nate fell to his knees beside her as Simon rushed to her aid. 

Mal turned and began untying Book. "Shepherd, Wash and Jayne are going to take you to the ship. We'll be along." 

Book paused after getting to his feet. "Captain, I should stay and see to her." 

Mal pushed him forward to where Jayne, Inara, and Wash waited impatiently by the mule. "You stay here, and all this is for nothing. I can't guarantee you that that man there won't change his mind about killing you, so get. You can pray on the way." Book nodded. 

Turning back, Mal looked at Zoe. She shook her head. Mayli might have been able to survive either of the shots alone, but together the bullets fired by Zoe and Nate would kill her. Simon knelt beside Mayli still, but it was clear there was nothing much he could really do for her. Mal walked closer to the three on the ground intending to retrieve Simon. 

Mayli was fighting the pain as Nate soothed her. Simon was attempting to slow the bleeding as he felt Mal try to pull him away. He shook off the other man's hand and continued to work. 

"Why can't you ever listen?" Nate kept repeating as he held her head. 

Mayli turned her head wincing as her breathing became more difficult. Meeting his eyes, she whispered to him. Simon barely heard what she said, but he clearly saw the effect on Nate. As she took her last breath, the other man continued to caress her hair, his face a mask after the brief glimpse the doctor saw of grief and guilt. This time when Mal went to pull Simon to his feet, he allowed himself to be dragged away from the grieving man. He took a last look back at the pair as Zoe and Mal hurried to leave the camp. 

* * *

Epilogue 

Simon gazed up at the black from his chair in the kitchen. His sister had been glad to see him return and Kaylee had been ecstatic. Apparently, River had been more than a handful after the second day and Kaylee had not been able to get near her to give the girl her medicine. As a result, a few more things on the ship were broken, but in all life appeared normal. 

Mal and Zoe were still cool towards Book, but Simon had not heard any talk of them making the preacher leave the ship. Simon dragged himself back to reality as he heard someone enter the kitchen. 

"You should be asleep son. Your sister's quiet and restful, you shouldn't waste what isn't plentiful," Mal observed as poured himself a drink. 

"I never sleep well after I lose a patient." 

Mal looked at the younger man and poured a second drink. Offering it to the doctor he sat down across from him at the table. "She didn't die while you were treating her doc, you had no effect on the outcome back there." 

"I just don't understand it, Captain. After removing that shrapnel from her, her life would have been pain-free in a few weeks. I can't understand how she could sacrifice all of it." 

Mal sighed and took a drink. Simon Tam was more of an innocent than even his sister. The things that he took as fact of life, to Simon they were catastrophes; problems to be fixed rather than realities to be lived with. "Son, some pain ain't physical. She didn't want to be fixed so she kept it raw, hurting." Simon just shook his head and stared into his drink. "Simon, what did she say before we left?" 

Simon looked up and met his eyes. He'd told the others at breakfast that morning what she had said to him in her tent. "She told Nate that he should have done what she'd asked when they met. That he'd been a fool." Mal shook his head. That explained the pole axed expression he'd seen as he pulled Simon away. He'd pity the grieving man except that Nate had to have known Mayli was broken when he'd chosen to stay with her. He had to have known after a while that she'd never started living again after Temburong. And if he hadn't realized that fact, well, the poor bastard had understood it at the end. 

Mal stood. "Simon, you can think on it all you want. But I promise you that you won't ever understand it until you lose everything, especially hope. And as your friend, I hope you never do." With that, Mal left the room and started for the bridge. 

Book was waiting for him there. "Those were kind words, Captain." 

Mal swore under his breath. The preacher was quieter on his feet than Zoe when he put his mind to it. The captain sat down in the pilot's seat and hoped that Book would leave him be if he didn't talk. 

"I just wanted to make sure that you were okay with" 

Mal interrupted him. "With what Book? What are you so concerned I'm okay with?" 

"With her death. I know you tried your best, and I appreciate it. It's not on your shoulders you know." 

Mal angrily turned the chair so he was facing Book. "You're right there. It's not on mine, Zoe's or even Nate's. It's on your shoulders Book." 

"Captain," 

"Just leave me be Book. I already told you, you're welcome to stay as long as you can pay passage. Until then, you're crew. We clear or you got other secrets to get off your chest?" 

"No," Book replied as he sighed. 

"Then get off my bridge." As he heard Book leave, Mal turned back to the Black. He was eager for morning to come so the sounds of his crew, of his family, would fill up the hollowness. Until then, he leaned back to enjoy the freedom again. 

The end. 

* * *

Notes: Neroli reminded me that Book says during the episode of Serentiy that he never married. I claim artistic license as I needed something for him to leave behind. I hope it didn't pull anyone out of the story too much. Thanks to everyone who commented on Fireflyfans.net as I posted the chapters --- was very glad that it was entertaining enough for people to want more.

Please post a comment on this story.

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title:   **Preacher's Prayer**   
Author:   **Jebbypal**   [email]   
Details:   **Standalone**  |  **PG-13**  |  **gen**  |  **53k**  |  **03/21/04**   
Characters:  Malcolm, Simon, Book   
Summary:  Book's past causes trouble for the crew of Serenity   
  



End file.
